There's a slow change that's been happening for the past few months despite my ups and downs with drinking. I am becoming more conscious and deliberate. I am getting more work done, finishing what I start, getting my exercise in and even starting to make better food choices.
Although living in this little trailer in the cool autumn on the gravel driveway of what will become our home sweet home has created barriers to fulfilling all my goals (ie: my juicer just takes up too much valuable space; so does my rebounder) I've managed to bridle that elusive presence of mind enough to set aside time on most days to complete a few life affirming activities and practices.
When I do office paperwork, which I find mundane, I set a timer and reward myself with a walk or a cup of tea. Alternately, when I take a break I sometimes set a timer to ensure I get back at my work. This helps me structure my days whereas I would otherwise be scattered and unproductive.
Being sober last night was a blessing as the little trailer was in disarray and, before I went to bed, I took the time to quietly put things back in order before climbing into the bed under the canvas with my sleeping hubby. The coffee was set up and the little counter was clear as well as the minute floor space.
Rome wasn't built in a day and this old ancient body is slowly turning into a proud, solid piece of heritage property; one that my children and grandchildren can be proud of... and especially one that I can be proud of.